Lessons Learned from a Hiatus
Today at a glance:
For 13 months between 2021 and 2022, I took a break from social media. As uncool as this may sound, I wanted to escape the pressure of maintaining an online persona
Used the time to write about important events and today is about one of those events and the lessons from it
Lessons about valuing human connection, being ready to make mistakes, and other things.
March 13, 2022
"My God, this is going to be a wonderful day, Temi called me"
This is the statement that the lips of a friend bore today as she picks my call.
I can feel the excitement in her voice, and considering we haven't spoken in months, I am glad she feels this way.
We get to catch up, asking about our mutual friends, some good old bantering, and reminiscing about the old good days when the weight of adulthood had yet to fully dawn on us.
Then out of nowhere, she asks "When are you coming back online, Temi?".
Since I had been asked this a lot, I gave my usual answer: "Soon", which stands for "I don't freaking know".
To be honest, I don't know and as I write this particular entry, I had no definite timeline in mind, I just understood it would be soon (however late or early that may be).
My friend understanding my cluelessness drops the subject but goes on to tell me how she has missed Letting My Hair Down. She expresses how much she missed how candid and inspiring my posts were, a sentiment shared by a select few who had reached out during my social media hiatus.
On this particular day though, this sentiment touched me. It reminded me of why I started Letting My Hair Down in the first place. I wanted to let people know that they are not alone in the world with their struggles and remind them of the blessings in their lives
While my initial desire may have been altruistic, it gradually evolved into a more complex inclination that was selfish and needed recognition from others. Coupled with the fact that I had reached a nihilistic point where I thought there was no point being on social media, I took a much-needed break.
This is why I am writing today's entry, in case of my eventual return. I told myself that if I were to reemerge, it would be with a meaningful reason. My friend’s call provided a glimpse of that reason.
The curated lives on social platforms had previously unsettled me, and I remain uncertain whether my return will alter this perception. Nevertheless, I am willing to make the effort.
I am willing to try again, to be vulnerable and honest, and to connect with others in a meaningful way. It may not be perfect even though I usually expect it to be but damn it all...I am going to try.
And truth be told... I have missed everyone. Though I am not currently active online as I pen these words, I sincerely hope this message when it gets out finds you all in good spirits.
Salud.
It’s April 2024 and I am looking at this entry and thankful for growth. While I do get the urge to just go offline again from time to time (LOL), I remember my why and it keeps me grounded.
Here are other lessons, I get from this particular writing:
To have friends is human, and to connect is divine:
Despite my hiatus from social media, it was the discussion with my friend that reignited feelings of coming back. It shows how important it is to maintain relationships and stay connected with loved ones.
I realized that true connections are not measured by likes or comments, but by the genuine conversations and support we offer each other. It is in these moments of sharing, listening, and understanding that I find solace and meaning. And for that, I am grateful.
Authenticity Over Perfection:
Maybe because I knew I wasn’t sharing this with people immediately, I could be authentic here. I could express my desire to return to social media not as someone flawless, but as a relatable individual who can empathize with others' struggles. So far, I think I am doing alright.
I have being able to connect with others authentically and share both the ups and downs of life. It's okay to not have it all together, and I am learning to embrace that more each day.
Purposeful Social Media Use:
Taking a break from social media allowed me to reevaluate my relationship with it. It set the intention to return with a clear purpose—to remind people that they are not alone in their struggles and to spread positivity. This emphasizes the importance of mindful and purposeful social media use rather than mindless scrolling or seeking validation.
You can always try again:
Despite uncertainties and past concerns, I was willing to try again. While I acknowledged the challenges and potential pitfalls of doing so, I was still determined to give it another shot. My point, you lose when you give up. Keep trying.
Do it scared, Do it imperfect:
It’s been two years since i wrote the post above and I can say this certainly: I still have my imperfections both online and offline. But it is not deterring me from moving forward.
Am I scared sometimes that I making a big mistake and this whole thing would give the same result? Yes. Am I doing it anyway? Yes. Life is not always perfect, but it's worth engaging in despite its flaws.
I sincerely loved reading this point by past me. It was one way to encourage me because I got a bad reply this week. (Remember how I said I was going to try asking for something last week? I did and well, it didn’t turn out well). However, I am not giving it up. I am going to try another way.
And if you’ve had any bad issues this week, I hope you dust yourself and get back up. It’s the failures that make the success story sweeter.
Remember, you've got this.
Salud.
In Case You Missed It:
Last Week, we took a look at the gap between our ability to give advice and our ability to follow it, the psychological reason for this gap and strategies for closing it.
My Top Resources/Recommendations for This Week:
Oppenheimer: A historical movie about the father of the atomic bomb. I watched it this weekend and boy, it was really good. Takes a deep look into how often we consider the consequences of our actions. Also, if you are big science nerd, you get to see key scientific figures.
Ryuichi Sakamoto - Merry Christmas, Mr. Lawrence: If you are into classical music or not, I strongly recommend this. It is a bittersweet melody. You will be captivated by its tune and emotional depth. Trust me.